Saturday 5 July 2014

DAN THE BEETLE



i first saw dan walking a parabola across the office floor.  there was fluff trapped on his back leg and i stepped on the fluff.  he struggled but came lose. he continued his parabola.

later im having black and hot and bitter coffee in an NCB mug, wondering if war would help my creativity.  i see dan walking a different parabloa.  corner to corner - a long epic trek.  again he has fluff on a back leg.  i step on it and he struggles like hes skating on ice.  the fluff comes away again.  he continues.

dave works here too.  hes new.  hes ok.  he belches all day tho.  from the moment he comes in the door hes belching.  low wet belches.  subterranean and disgusting.  actually hes not ok.  he eats his sandwiches with his mouth open and sounds like half a zoo.  his conversation is uninspired, hes a dull regular joe.  i mention dan.

WHO THE FUCKS DAN ?

i tell him that whats i named the beetle who carries fluff.

OH YEAH I SEEN HIM, STROLLING ABOUT WITH BITS OF FLUFF.

i dont tell anyone else.  this is a hospital and everyone has an irrational idea that all beetles are cockroaches and should be immediately incinerated under the supervision of Infection Control.  
they also say DONT STEP ON A COCKROACH, YOUR SHOES WILL BE COVERED IN COCKROACH EGGS AND YOULL SPREAD THEM ROUND THE WHOLE 
PLACE ! 

i see him again a week later.  hes got no fluff.  i was wondering about street photography and if i could build a hide in the mall.  hes walking tight circles by the bin.

later that day hes not moving.

DAVE, DID YOU SQUASH DAN ?

NO, HES OK.

we look closer.  hes not ok.  i go to find a something small like a matchbox and some tissue and when i come back dans squashed into a dirty brown smear.  stuff like caramel or snot in a four inch trail.

DAVE, YOU SQUASHED HIM.

OH YEAH he laughs BOUND TO HAPPEN

i scrape him up with size 15 scalpel and wipe him into the bin.  as an after thought i get some fluff from inside the big printer.  theres always fluff inside the big printer.  i lay the fluff over him.  theres only shredded documents in the bin and it looks kind of ok to me.

THERE YOU GO DAN i say RIP FELLA.




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